Wings are Wonderful Things!
by Tetsu Deinonychus
Summary: Oneshot. Renton x Eureka. From my twisted mind. The people of Bellforset have a very unexpected reaction to Eureka's wings, in what I hope you consider a delightfully twisted comedy. Now, easier to read!


Disclaimer: I don't own Eureka Seven and I make no profit from this fan work. I'm just a geek, with a tad too much spare time, having a little fun. Like playing with action figures.

UPDATE: Taking SoldierSteak's suggestion, I decided to re-space the dialogue to make it easier to read. Enjoy.

There's kind of a lack of humorous one shots in this category (especially with a Renton x Eureka pairing). I guess everyone's so wrapped up in making these epic "sequel-fics" (although they're quite good, and are the inspiration for this fic), that nobody's just having fun with short lighthearted (or subversive) comedy stories. Well don't worry! That's where _**I**_ come in! And, so I present...

_**"Wings Are Wonderful Things!"**_

The crisis was over. And Renton was looking forward to returning to Bellforest with his new family. As he finally traveled to his hometown he looked over beside him, at Eureka, the girl he loved so much. He smiled as he took in her beauty, he considered her the loveliest being he had ever laid eyes on. She was like an angel, complete with wings. Renton loved her wings, but they put a stop to his smile, for those wings were what so clearly marked her as something not human.

Renton, of course, had no problem with his beloved Eureka being a corallian. She was his sweet, gentle, little, "honey-bunny". Nothing else mattered. But, would the people of Bellforest see her that way? **He kind of hoped not! **He certainly **didn't** want everyone in town to **fall in love **with her! (AN: You gotta pay attention to what you're reading, folks). But, he most certainly **did** want them to see her as a real person, and to accept her relationship with him. That's the part that worried him. "_Will the people of my hometown, really accept a love between a human boy and a corallian girl?_"he thought to himself, "_I may find those wings of hers beautiful, but I doubt anyone else will_".

**...or will they?**

They finally arrived home where the children were awaiting them. The children that loved and regarded Eureka as their mother, and over time grew to love Renton as their father, eagerly greeted them.

"MAMA" they all shouted with glee, in unison, as they ran over and hugged her tightly, so glad to be reunited with their dear adopted mother. Renton smiled at this and said "hey kids! Aren't you glad to see **me** too?".

"PUKEY" they all shouted with glee, in unison, as they ran over and hugged him tightly, so glad to be reunited with their dear adopted father. Renton groaned with embarrassment.

Hey, I said they **loved** him as their father, I didn't say they **respected** him as their father.

After some rest and much catching up, Renton, Eureka and the kids all went shopping for groceries. "_This is it. This is the test. It's time...to see just how all the people that I grew up around react to the girl I love_" thought Renton overdramatically as they finally stepped out in public. And, immediately they were the center of attention.

To Renton's dismay everyone was staring right at them. It was making the young family very uncomfortable. "_Oh no. They must hate Eureka for what she is!! Well, I'll stand by her no matter what!"_ internally panicked Renton. But then, he realized something about the way they were looking at Eureka. It wasn't a look of fear or prejudice at all. It was a look of **desire! **They were **ogling** her! Renton really wasn't sure whether to be relieved by this or not.

On one hand, there was no prejudice toward her corallian nature or her unusual wings. But still, he really didn't like having people look at his **girlfriend** that way. Even worse, some of the guys looking at her were just a tad too old to be looking at a girl Eureka's age.

On the other hand, at least they didn't seem to care that she wasn't technically human. They just saw her as the new pretty girl in town, nothing more. This was bad but nothing that unusual. "_At least it has nothing to do with her wings_" Renton thought to himself.

Sure, Renton, sure.

"Hey Renton buddy! Long time no see!" said a boy Renton's age, with a cool pair of shades, walking towards them.

"Kazu?! Is that you?" asked Renton, barely recognizing his former classmate.

"In 3-D and sen-surround! Hells yeah it's me" answered Kazu enthusiastically. Renton barely knew Kazu back in school, but the few times they did talk, Kazu was quite friendly, if a bit on the "wild-side". "So, aren't you going to introduce me?" asked Kazu looking at Eureka.

Renton cleared his throat. "Yes Kazu, I'd like you to meet my **girlfriend** Eureka. Eureka, meet Kazu" said Renton making damn sure Kazu heard the word "girlfriend".

"Hello Eureka! So, where did you get those sweet wings? They look so real!" greeted and asked Kazu.

"I ...don't know…I just …grew them" answered Eureka.

Kazu looked very confused.

Renton sighed. "They **are** real. She happens to be a corallian. I hope you don't have a problem with that" explained Renton.

Kazu's reaction was not what Renton expected.

"You lucky devil!" exclaimed Kazu as he nudged Renton's arm. Renton now was the confused one. "**My** girlfriend just wears cheep costume fake wings. It's hard enough to find decent fake wings and here you hook-up with a chick that has real wings! Man, you are a wing-fetish GOD!" elaborated Kazu.

"Wing-fetish? What are you talking about?" asked Renton.

"Like you don't know! It's all over the place! Girls wearing wings to please their boyfriends. Wing-fetish magazines in all the stores, and here you show up, you lucky devil, with your corallian girlfriend who actually has a set of **real natural** wings! You stud you!" explained Kazu with a big grin. Renton and Eureka were blushing furiously. Kazu attempted to high-five Renton. Renton didn't accept. "Bet you have a lot of fun with her" whispered Kazu to Renton with a wink.

"IT'S NOT LIKE THAT!!!" shouted a very red-faced Renton Thurston.

"Sorry buddy. Didn't mean to step out of line" apologized Kazu as he held up his hands in defense.

Renton relaxed, until Maeter spoke. "Mama, Daddy, What's a 'fetish'?" asked Maeter.

"I really don't know" answered Eureka.

Renton groaned. He was _**so**_ not looking forward to **that** discussion.

Kazu looked a little stunned. Then he just smiled. "Did she just call you two 'Mama' and 'Daddy'?" he asked.

Not realizing there was anything weird about it Maeter responded "Uh-huh! I'm Maeter and these are my brothers Linck and Maurice!" explained Maeter.

Kazu smiled. "Wow, you've been **awfully** busy. I didn't think you had it in you" said Kazu.

"THEY'RE ADOPTED, YOU MORON!!" yelled Renton.

"Heh-heh, sure they are. Anyway, see ya!" said Kazu as he left waving goodbye.

Once Kazu was out of their sight, he slipped into a nearby alley where Mathieu, of all people, was waiting for him, with a camera aimed straight at where Renton and Eureka were.

"Thanks for your help" said Mathieu as he gave Kazu a handful of money.

"Sure, being annoying is my specialty, and It's great to help the legendary Gekko-State, but why all the trouble?" asked Kazu.

"When we found out about the whole 'Wing-Fetish' thing, we decided to make this an official Gekko-State **'prank mission'**. Now hopefully the agent we have waiting at his house can do **his** part" explained Mathieu.

The rest of the shopping trip wasn't much fun for Renton, more people looking lustfully at Eureka, more people telling him what a "lucky devil" he is, and even overhearing catty remarks from women about how desperate for male attention they thought Eureka was. He was so glad to finally get home, where he was safe.

"Grandpa, we're home!" announced Renton as he came in the door.

"Renton, welcome back! One of your Gekko-State friends is here" said Axel as he pointed to Moondoggie who was sitting in the chair right next to him.

"What's up?" greeted Moondoggie. He was sitting in one of the living-room chairs holding a stack of magazines and a shopping bag.

"Brother Doggie!" exclaimed Renton, delighted to see his friend.

"Hey Renton dude I was just at the newsstand and saw these and figured I'd buy 'em for ya" he said handing Renton the stack of reading material.

Renton excitedly looked at the magazines in his hands, but was horrified when he realized what they were. They were all **wing-fetish** magazines! "Thought you'd enjoy them" remarked Moondoggie, completely ignoring Renton's obvious discomfort. "Anyway, gotta get back to the Gekko. I just bought **these** for Gidget" he said pulling a pair of red plastic wings out of his shopping bag. "After all, not all of us are lucky enough to have a girlfriend with her own pair of real wings" said Moondoggie as he went towards the door. "**You lucky devil**" he added with a wink as he left.

"Et tu, Brother Doggie?" mumbled Renton.

Renton was mortified beyond belief. "WHY THE HELL DOES EVERYONE GOTTA BE SUCH A PERV?! THIS TOWN STILL SUCKS. IT SUCKED THEN, AND IT SUCKS NOW! I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS!!!" Renton shouted all this and much more. All the while being observed by the hidden camera Moondoggie left there.

Aboard the Gekko, the entire crew (except Hilda) were laughing their asses off at Renton's rant.

"Mission Accomplished! I **knew** that would set him off!" announced Talho.

"This is even better than his initiation prank with the Ramen!" declared Hap.

"These pranks of yours don't even make any sense" muttered Hilda shaking her head and rolling her eyes at her crewmates. She was the only one who didn't think this was hilarious.

"I LOVE THAT KID! HE'S SUCH A DRAMA-QUEEN!" called out Holland in between chuckling like a mad-man.

Everyone nodded their agreement. **Renton was indeed a drama-queen**.

Stoner was also enjoying the whole spectacle. "_Yeah, this will make a great back-up Ray-out article. A little something fun to read after all those hard-hitting truth exposing articles_" thought Stoner. "H_mm… and maybe a 'Ladies of Gekko-State' photo section where they're all wearing wings. Gotta get more people to read, __**somehow**_" he added.

Because, let's face it, Women with wings is a sexy idea.

Come on. Admit it. You'll feel better. (Personally I can think of a few girls I've known that would look great with maybe dragonfly wings, but that's a different story).

**THE END**

_Thank you for indulging my waste of time._ Ham


End file.
